FCuK this LIFE! hate myself!

everything is just falling apart :( and FCUK! it's all because of me! i'm such a DUMB! i lied. about the dance, aboutmy other friendster account which i hid for almost months and months already.
there's this song that i keep on playing for how many times now. it's for him. tha song is about us. the only reason why i don't want the song to stop playin' is because i'm missing him. and i am sorry for my mistake. i don;t know how to explain everything to him. he won't even listen to me now. i'm sorry if i've been so dumb! it wasn't my intention to hurt you. it's not my intention to fool you. i didn't think. and now, i don't know if i can still have you back. and i want you back. i can't stand living wihtout you :( bryan, you're my life. i wish i never did anything stupid! i wish i never lied :( now i'm regreting everything :( im sorry.. i know it's not that easy for you t o forgive me.. i'll wait for that time to come.. just please don't ever ever leave me :(