let me start it with a *sigh! haaaay :( i don't understand why i feel this way.. he's been in my mind for like what? a week maybe.. he. i mean, bryan. tsk. why can't i get over him...this is driving me insane. this is just so wrong. you know what? there were i guess, two or three nights that i cried because i missed him? i don't know. who can tell? *sigh! again! this is stressing me out. i came to a point when i started comparing the differences between bryan and virgil. it's just so fukcin' wrong! i'm not myself lately, or am i? GAHD!!
to tell you the truth, i have messaged him, i greeted him because it was his birthday last 18th. and i was so fukcin' anxious that he's not replyin'.. only to know that he's not in washington but in calif right now. so yeah, that explains why he hasn't replied. i am, yes! waiting for a reply. i look desperate! goodness!! but the hell i care! this is what i want now. i am not after anything.. i am only doing this because, i miss the feeling of having him. i am not expecting for anything. i am not doing this to have him back.. it's not like that and i don't even think that would be a great idea. i just want to feel that he's not gone.. like, he's still here.. for me.. because he has been my bestfriend.. he was once my best friend :(
if ever virgil could read this, maybe he'll get angry or upset but know what? he shouldn't feel that way because i love him and i wont do anything that could make him mad.. i'm just trying to burst out what i feel because i can't talk with this kind of stuffs with virgil.. right? and i don't wanna share this things to anyone because, i don't want to hahaha haaay i just hope and pray that everything will be fine...
God is good.i know. :)